Slay like David

March 1, 2019

 

 

     I asked one of my best friend’s to make this shirt for me because I love the story of David and Goliath. When I saw the shirt I was in love with it! Then I started thinking of why I love the story so much and God put something on my heart that I just had to share.

We all know the story of David and Goliath. If you don't, I encourage you to go to 1 Samuel and read the story because it’s definitely one of my favorites.

 

     Goliath was a Philistine giant that was well over nine feet tall. For 40 days, he would challenge the Israelites to fight. Saul, the King of Israel, and the rest of his army were terrified of Goliath. One day David, who was the youngest son of Jesse and a young teenager, volunteered to fight Goliath. All David took with him to fight Goliath was his shepherd’s staff, sling and five stones. Goliath insulted David for trying to defeat him without even wearing any armor. David responded by telling him that he didn't need any armor because he was going to defeat him in the name of the Lord Almighty. He threw his first stone and hit Goliath on his forehead, Goliath fell and David used Goliath's own sword to cut off his head.That is just a quick summary but it leads me to ask you...

 

What is your Goliath?

 

     My Goliath was insecurity and never feeling as if I was good enough. I lacked confidence and it affected me in every aspect of my life. My marriage crumpled because I was insecure and it led me to constantly battle with thoughts I would make up in my mind and what was happening in real life. There were so many days I didn’t feel as if I was good enough to have a happy marriage or I felt as if I didn’t deserve a happy life period. So in turn, this made me fight with my husband nearly every day. If he was working late I always accused him of cheating, if he went to lunch with coworkers, I would accuse him of lying and being with a woman. Eventually....this did lead him to the arms another woman. I was so wrapped up with my own insecurities that whenever I wasn’t fighting with him, I would ignore him and what he needed from me. When he would come home it was nothing but me being ugly, nagging and saying hateful things. All he needed from me was support and someone to listen to when he came home. I couldn’t do that because I was so focused on myself so in a way, I pushed him to the other woman. Was it right? No, but I'm not going to pretend I was perfect. I know I'm at fault for my actions too.  I let the thoughts that the enemy was putting in my mind destroy my marriage and my happiness. 

 

     I let my insecurities affect me when it came to having a job or career I loved. For almost four years, I was at a job that I wasn't happy at. I became comfortable so I settled. I would tell myself over and over that I only had two years of junior college, there was nothing else for me. There were days I would tell myself I'm not smart enough to find a better job. The worst thing I would tell myself is that I wasn’t good enough to find a job that I loved. I always had a passion for photography but I convinced myself I wasn't experienced enough or talented enough to pursue it as anything more than a hobby. It took me getting fired for me realize that now I can do what I want with my future. I wanted to do something I really enjoyed...something that gave me a sense of fulfillment. I had to stop the negative thoughts that I had about myself. I had to stop making excuses for not going after the things I wanted in my life.

 

     The change in me didn’t happen overnight. I wasn't as lucky as David when he only had to throw one stone before he got Goliath down. I had to wait years because I wasn’t sure what my Goliath was until it came to a breaking point. You see, David didn’t fear Goliath....David went against Goliath because he had faith that his God would lead him to victory. With his sling, his stones and his faith... he defeated Goliath. 

 

I want you to ask yourself this once again, “What is your Goliath?”

Is it pride, rejection, jealousy, insecurity? What is holding you back or challenging you?

Whatever it may be, it probably seems undefeatable. 

 

     That’s exactly what I thought about my insecurities and feelings of inadequacy but when I started praying and having faith that God would remove those feelings.....that’s when I slowly defeated my giant. I'm sure these feelings may come back, maybe on those days I'm going down dark memories.  No matter how many times my Goliath tries to rear it’s ugly head, I will always have faith in my God! He will always be on my side to help me defeat any giants I may come across in my life. I tell myself on a daily basis that I am good enough, I am talented enough, I am worthy and I am chosen. We are the only ones that are in control of what challenges us and we are not meant to take them on alone. Whenever you doubt what you can do with what lies ahead, remember who is by your side. Remember who will not leave you nor forsake you.

 

And He said to them, "Because of the littleness of your faith; for truly I say to you, if you have faith the size of a mustard seed, you will say to this mountain, 'Move from here to there,' and it will move; and nothing will be impossible to you.  Matthew 17:20 

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